Gergő Balogh, PhD.

Researcher and Software Engineer

Description

Two students on the same team—one quiet, the other talkative but prone to distraction—could not choose a representative and kept redirecting responsibility toward each other, despite contributing well when they genuinely engaged. To illustrate what the role required, I briefly role-played as a representative from another team, making clear that my style was only one possibility, not a prescription. After class, I stayed with them to describe observable behaviors using “this is what I see,” reminding them that I cannot read intentions—silence may stem from shyness, distraction from a rough day. I explained that their team still must function collectively and offered concrete suggestions, such as avoiding phone use and voicing ideas even before they are polished. I also shared, as a personal and non-binding opinion, who I thought might fit the representative role and why. Importantly, I only stayed because I had the emotional and practical capacity to do so; if I hadn’t, I would have invited them to a scheduled “office hour” instead, since a rushed or frustrated presence would undermine the safe atmosphere quiet students especially need. Throughout the conversation, I avoided shielding them from natural consequences like deadlines or lost points—these are part of the learning environment—but I did not blame them either. My aim was not judgment but support, using grades simply as a tool to mirror real-world accountability rather than as punishment. I left feeling the extra time was well spent because it helped them grow rather than feeding urgency or frustration.

Practical Tips for Tutors

  1. Only stay for extra guidance when you can offer calm, unhurried presence; otherwise schedule a dedicated “office hour.” A pressured or frustrated mood suppresses student openness—especially for quieter students—so protect the environment before you protect the schedule.

  2. Give clear, non-interpretive feedback and invite initiative rather than assigning blame. Describe what you observed, acknowledge that behavior may have many causes, and offer concrete actions (e.g., no phone use, speak early and imperfectly) to help the team function.

  3. Let natural consequences stand, but frame them as learning tools rather than punishments. Deadlines, lost points, or slower progress should educate, not shame—your goal is to help them grow, with grading serving as an analogy to real project responsibilities.